two months ago, rising up from the floor seemed impossible. a dog’s paws, literally on her arm, holding. consoling. there was the shaking. the uncontrollable sobbing. and then the shriveling. the weakness. the darkness. the hunger. but now lying in bed, naked, a glimmer of light peeks through the blinds, accentuating the curves of her […]Read more "normalcy"
it was quite a day of ups and downs. and not just in yoga. heard from someone I’ve been missing so, so much and it both helped and hurt … but it was needed. much needed. dare I say it was even good. difficult, yes. but good. there was therapy right after (thank goodness) and […]Read more "good"
please don’t tell me how to grieve. stop saying that I overshare. stop telling me that I’m humiliating myself by talking about all of the good memories. and please stop telling me I need to be angry and move on. stop telling me things that make the tiniest pieces of my heart that haven’t yet […]Read more "process"
these kids. my goodness, how I love them. and my goodness, how they have me constantly running. today was spent running kids to school and then running myself to work. then it was picking Little Man up from robotics, G from his dad’s. then we were off to buy clothes for G’s Model UN event this […]Read more "busy little bees"
everyone has issues. we aren’t special, other than in all of the ways we were so fucking special.Read more "yes we were"
when I move my foot over even a few inches, it’s just cold. I wake and immediately feel alone. yesterday, I woke crying. I don’t know how long I’d been crying. that was weird. I told someone the other day that I remember this part … the not being able to leave my tiny corner. […]Read more "no comfort"
it’s startling, really, how a simple object collecting dust around the house can leave you whimpering on the ground like a dying rat. and then, once you’ve gained a bit of your composure, you look around and realize that even from the vantage point down here on the floor every god damn item within eyeshot […]Read more "thread"
she held the memories close to her heart. memories are, after all, what keeps us moving. they keep us loving and learning and wanting more. what else do we have but memories? they are our stories. they weave us into who we are now and who we’ll become tomorrow. she knew change was imminent. it […]Read more "let them fly"
I had walked around the streets of Paris for what felt like at least 30 miles before I gave in and bought a ticket for a red double-decker “hop on-hop off” bus. it was a bold move for someone who admittedly would rather slit her wrists and bleed out slowly than to take in a […]Read more "that time I hated Paris"
it wasn’t that she tried, really. it was more that she didn’t try. and it was still so good. but no matter what anyone does, there are no guarantees in love or life. her wish was that he’d still be there for her, no matter what. even when far away, she still needed him. and […]Read more "be there"